What if we lived in a world where we could be truly honest? What if there were fewer divorces because we were honest? Less infidelity? “If you love it, let it go”. Maybe we need to redefine what letting go means. Does letting go mean you completely lose them in your life? Or just understanding them and their needs and letting go of your selfishness. Furthermore, recognizing you can’t, and shouldn’t, meet 100% of those needs nor would you want that responsibility.
Other countries have different perspectives and cultures on love, partnership, roles and communication. Men often have wives and girlfriends and there’s just a common respect between each other to coexist. There are legal factors also involved, although I’m referring to the more emotional ones here. I found quick, interesting study HERE as I’m always just curious.
Honesty can act in your favor.
We put too much pressure and unrealistic expectations on our partners which causes the exact opposite of what we want to happen. Withdraw. From a deeper connection and understanding with whom we love. It just often happens too late. That’s why we seek it elsewhere. From our parents to friends to coworkers to perhaps lovers. If we’re mature and self-aware enough, we too gain. Perhaps if not now, but at some point in our lives we’ll feel the same as our partners, wanting more freedom or understanding from the other. To be able to do the same in an open, honest, understanding environment- spend more time with your friends, not be judged, and find your needs fulfilled in other ways as well.
Isn’t this love?
I believe it actually starts with honesty with yourself at all costs. About your feelings, your intentions, and reality. Are we making excuses, sugar-coating, and justifying? Sure this is all-natural psychological reactions, but it takes a moment to really step back and look at the big picture.
Can you do it?
Maybe honesty is the key before we get pushed to the point of complete withdraw, anger or resentment. But where is that line and can most people handle it? Sadly, no. But you have to do it early. Or else we live in a world of dishonesty just to protect the ones we love and our own selves in spite of our own needs. And for how long does this go on and can it be undone? Until we cheat, crack, break, or leave. Or fix it. And that’s ok too.
I’m just wondering…”What if?”
If you actually love somebody “they” say you let them go, right? Well, what if you don’t have to let them go? You love them enough to say “I understand your needs. I know you’re human, and it’s ok.” You let their spirit go to be alive, and free yourself too.
This video is one of my favorites. I’m in my 40’s now and this is what I’ve experienced myself and through my friends. I get why they call it “mid-life crisis” for many reasons. To me, it’s not about infidelity, it’s about being ALIVE.
